American Madness

Intelligent Criticism in the Service of a Better Nation




Dick Fuld Deathwatch

Posted by Josh Friedlander | 9 Comments

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As a friend just wrote to me: “Will Dick Fuld survive? He’s in the final stages of Scarface: killing everyone.”

* * *

And now a musical interlude (every year, the NYFWA throws a show parodying the year’s financial follies. Here was a song that was to run this year, but which will probably have to be rewritten):

Fuld’s still standing (apologies to Bernie Taupin and Elton John)

You could never know what its like
Your books are bloody so you roll the dice
And there’s a huge credit line that’s pulled from you
You’ll wind up like O’Neill or Callan, Cayne or Prince or Cruz

And did you think Einhorn could ever win?
Well, see Dick Fuld, he’s coming back again
He threw Erin Callan in the bullet’s way
And if you need to know why Fuld’s still standing, he won’t go away

Don’t you know Fuld’s still standing better than he ever did
Looking like a true survivor. Feeling like a swinging dick
He’s still standing after all this time
Selling off the pieces of his bank with Einhorn far behind

Fuld’s still standing yeah yeah yeah
Fuld’s still standing yeah yeah yeah

No one gets how he can always win
Even with Wall Street’s finest always guarding him
Hedge fund hotties couldn’t cut him down
And if Lehman was named Goldman, he’d run the Fed by now

Fuld’s still standing yeah yeah yeah
Fuld’s still standing yeah yeah yeah

Comments

9 Responses to “Dick Fuld Deathwatch”

  1. Keith
    September 9th, 2008 @

    Is his name really Dick Fuld? Sounds like a porn name. What’s next, Vagina Crease…

  2. sam stevenson
    September 10th, 2008 @

    You ask, how long will Dick Fuld survive? The answer, its has been far too long already! His departure, without heafty severance, is long overdue.

  3. Amy
    September 11th, 2008 @

    Who is Dick Fuld?

  4. Josh Friedlander
    September 11th, 2008 @

    Bless your heart, Amy.

  5. Grant Catton
    September 11th, 2008 @

    Amy,

    To answer your question, he’s a Shark who ate his way to the top of an investment bank, and is now going to take a huge fall.

    Outside of a miniscule group of journalists and market junkies (like Josh), nobody really cares about this. Nor should they.

    Grant

  6. Grant Catton
    September 11th, 2008 @

    By the way Josh: you’re either a genius, or a complete dork. Only time will tell.

  7. Amy
    September 11th, 2008 @

    Thanks, Josh – and Grant, too. :)

    I figured it was someone from the financial world, but I didn’t care enough to Google him this morning.

  8. American Madness » Blog Archive » You got to know when to Fuld ‘em
    September 15th, 2008 @

    [...] one for this year’s Follies show, now that “Fuld’s Still Standing” no longer [...]

  9. todd
    September 29th, 2008 @

    I hope richard severan fuld dies and rots in hell forever. all he cares about is himself and NO ONE else! He ruined countless lives all because of greed. He is a selfish prick who deserves no mercy

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