Workplace motivation

My boss has is deeply sarcastic:

Thanks everyone for working so hard this month. As a result, I have requested the US government to give you some extra cash, and they’ve agreed.

You’ll each get $600. If you are married and have kids, you’ll get even more! (depending on your total number of kids and if your family income exceeds $150,000, you wont get quite as much.)

This may not apply to the foreigners not paying US taxes, of course.

Please remember that when you start to yell at me or burst into tears.

Woops–I just heard that they’re already cutting it back.
Well, folks, I tried

- Michelle