Dear Dr. Fixit

Dear Dr. Fixit:

My daughter and her boyfriend are living together. After five years, they are not married - or even engaged.

We recently had family pictures taken and wanted a photo of us alongside our daughter and our son and his wife.

My daughter was very upset that we excluded her live-in boytoy. We tried to explain that our moral judgment and values don?t allow us to look at him as a member of the family because they aren’t married.

After much hand-wringing, I suggested we take a picture both ways, once without him and once with him. His response was: If they don?t want me in the picture, I won’t be in any picture at all.

This has caused a distance gap in our relationship with our daughter. Were my wife and I right or wrong? Did we screw up badly? And how do we work past this issue with our daughter? What should we do?

Signed,

Perplexed in Peoria

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Dear Perplexed:

Duhhh!

Signed,

Dr. Fixit

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Dear Dr. Fixit:

After I pour out my heart and soul to you, how disappointing to find you answer with a single word - it’s not even really a word. You demean me and our serious family problem. I am terribly upset.

Signed,

Perturbed in Peoria

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Dear Perturbed:

So?

Signed,

Dr. Fixit

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Dear Dr. Fixit:

Once again, you’ve let me down. Friends have led me to believe you’re an authority on human emotion and suffering and would offer a reasonable solution that would offer my family and I longlasting piece and harmony. Instead, I get monosyllabic responses that are uninformative, unhelpful and downright insulting. Can’t you engage me by using more than one word?

Signed,

Petulant in Peoria

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Dear Petulant:

How about a soothing and sympathetic haiku?

Dad and Mom tight-assed

Live-in getting free nookie

What are you, Amish?

Signed,

Dr. Fixit

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(contributed by Adam Najberg)